There are two main disturbing elements to the Millionaires. The first being, that people take them seriously as a legitimate band. The second being that a record company actually gave them a contract. A record company literally got their demo and said “these people are good enough for us to risk thousands of dollars on” and “we want to associate our label with alcoholic zombie hookers”. I’m really suprised somewhere down the line, not one person at the label said “oh wait, the Millionaires are actually glorified crack whores whose fans will only illegally download their music anyway”. But sadly not. There is simply no accountability at record companies these days.
But let’s start at the top. The Millionaires seem to have a fairly set ideology to their music;
1) Get drunk “Yeah, we’re getting pretty trashed”
2) Spend money doing the aforementioned “I just got paid, lets get laid”
3) Get laid “I want you in my bed, you heard what I said boyyyy, I want you in my bed!”
4) Find a rich boyfriend “I can’t lie, if he walks in, you suck him dry”
As you can see, the trio really aim high in life. This is reflected by the complexity of their lyrics with such gems as:
“Shes licking on her lollipop with her tongue, lets just shoot her with our guns”
“Shut up c**t I’ll cut your tongue”
“You can’t talk shit to us you haters, you’re the one that fucking made us” (Homegirl Kiki called, she wants her schtick back)
“Give me my alcohol, lets get fucked up, a-l-c-o-h-o-l”.
I was not maddened by that last lyrics though, I actually was impressed with the fact they could actually spell something with more than one syllable. I wish they could sing, unfortunately they just talk really fast in annoying chipmunk-like voices. In fact, theyre successfully able to do this at the exact same timbre for every single song. Such consistency is evidently a skill.
The beautiful irony of “Painted Whore” is that the slut they describe and criticise sounds exactly like them. I’m not sure if the irony is intentional, but “can you say STD?”. I think the big question lies in whether or not theyre trying to be a legit band. I can accept bad music when its clearly made tongue in cheek, like Anal Cunt. But it seems too much to me like the Millionaires really dont have anything going on beneath the hair spray. Their video clips aren’t witty, their style is generic scene/raver, their song titles don’t seem to indicate they’re being ironic or trying to be comical. For all intents and purposes they seem to take themselves seriously, which is why I can’t -at the very least- appreciate at them as a joke band.
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The Hunt for the Worst Musical Act: The Millionaires
Posted by Kristyn Glanville on Tuesday, August 31st, 2010
The Millionaires 'Stay The Night' xoxo
There are two main disturbing elements to the Millionaires. The first being, that people take them seriously as a legitimate band. The second being that a record company actually gave them a contract. A record company literally got their demo and said “these people are good enough for us to risk thousands of dollars on” and “we want to associate our label with alcoholic zombie hookers”. I’m really suprised somewhere down the line, not one person at the label said “oh wait, the Millionaires are actually glorified crack whores whose fans will only illegally download their music anyway”. But sadly not. There is simply no accountability at record companies these days.
But let’s start at the top. The Millionaires seem to have a fairly set ideology to their music;
1) Get drunk “Yeah, we’re getting pretty trashed”
2) Spend money doing the aforementioned “I just got paid, lets get laid”
3) Get laid “I want you in my bed, you heard what I said boyyyy, I want you in my bed!”
4) Find a rich boyfriend “I can’t lie, if he walks in, you suck him dry”
As you can see, the trio really aim high in life. This is reflected by the complexity of their lyrics with such gems as:
“Shes licking on her lollipop with her tongue, lets just shoot her with our guns”
“Shut up c**t I’ll cut your tongue”
“You can’t talk shit to us you haters, you’re the one that fucking made us” (Homegirl Kiki called, she wants her schtick back)
“Give me my alcohol, lets get fucked up, a-l-c-o-h-o-l”.
I was not maddened by that last lyrics though, I actually was impressed with the fact they could actually spell something with more than one syllable. I wish they could sing, unfortunately they just talk really fast in annoying chipmunk-like voices. In fact, theyre successfully able to do this at the exact same timbre for every single song. Such consistency is evidently a skill.
The beautiful irony of “Painted Whore” is that the slut they describe and criticise sounds exactly like them. I’m not sure if the irony is intentional, but “can you say STD?”. I think the big question lies in whether or not theyre trying to be a legit band. I can accept bad music when its clearly made tongue in cheek, like Anal Cunt. But it seems too much to me like the Millionaires really dont have anything going on beneath the hair spray. Their video clips aren’t witty, their style is generic scene/raver, their song titles don’t seem to indicate they’re being ironic or trying to be comical. For all intents and purposes they seem to take themselves seriously, which is why I can’t -at the very least- appreciate at them as a joke band.
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This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 31st, 2010 at 10:04 PM. It is filed under Blog, Commentary, Music and tagged with Hunt for Worst Musical Act, The Millionares. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.